I'm heading home from lakeside now.
Back to the apartment.
But ya know what?
It's not the same.
Today is my day. June 12, 2007. No bullshitting this time, my life changes. I'm sick of being emo and having absolutely no friends because I push myself away because I'm so emotionally needy, and I'm sick of not having the confidence in myself because of that. I got myself in a shitty cycle, but dammit, it ends today.

Sure, I'm nowhere near where I saw myself at 20. I'm not with who I saw myself with, I'm not at the college I saw myself attending, I'm not what I feel I should be.

But I'm the one preventing myself from going after my dreams now.
I'm the one emotionally beating myself down.

And I'm sick of my self induced emotional ass kicking. It's time pull myself up so I'm not on the ass end of it.

I'm gonna be trying to get counseling, because I know life isn't something you can take on your own, but I'm not dumping it all on my friends any more.

And dammit, today life changes. :)

I love my friends :)

hugs totally make my day better.
and i got my speech done.
and i hit level 24 with my hunter.

and if i hadn't had to drive home because i have work tomorrow, i would have enjoyed more of that wine cooler :<

maybe in a week? :)